The Three Stages Of Personal Development, A Beginning

One of the methods I recommend to you is that of the “Three Stages”. It is a way of dealing with yourself that has it’s roots in  positive psychology. This method gives you the tools to deal with all kinds of situations in an autonomous way.

The Three Stages are:

1. Regulation of the General Tension Level (GTL)
2. Tracking down and correction of so-called :”thinking errors”
3. Proactivity, thinking of and execution of useful behaviour that is in your best interest

The General Tension Level (GTL)

The General Tension Level (GTL) is the sum of all physical and mental sensations that you experience. It can consist of agreeable or unagreeable sensations, agreeable or unagreeable thoughts and agreeable or unagreeable emotions etc. Ideally the GTL is in neutral condition, let’s say ‘50′. In that state a human being normal feels OK. If your GTL is lower than ‘50′, for instance ‘30′ of ‘20′, then you may feel numb, uninspired or tired. In this case people often tend to avoid things. Is your GTL higher than ‘50′, for instance ‘70′ of ‘80′, then you may feel (too) energetic, hyper or also angry. In this case people often tend to seek confrontation. By the way, the tendencies to avoid or confront may also occur with other values of the GTL. In general it makes no sense to try and do something useful if your GTL is irregular (too high or too low). It that case it is wise to first try and regulate your GTL for it to become optimal again: Optimal Tension Level (OGT). You can try to regulate your GTL with the help of simple techniques:

• breathing exercises
• walking
• sports or physical exercise
• eating & drinking
• meditation
• taking a nap
• relaxation exercises
• “sleeping on it”

Taking On Thinking Errors

As soon as the GTL is on or close to the OTL it is useful to track down the thinking errors that may have contributed to your earlier irregular GTL. Thinking errors are thoughts that have no bearing on reality. They can be the cause for different kinds of (often negative) emotions. Thinking errors come in all forms and shapes and can be devided into different categories. Some examples of these categories are:

• Interpretation without (sufficient) observations
• Personalization
• Exageration
• “Doom” thinking
• Generalization
• “Black & White” thinking
• etc.

It is useful to try and track down your thinking errors and realize in what way and to what extend they negatively influence your perceptions and limit your behavioural possibilities. Next it is important to correct them, which means replacing them with realistic thoughts. This opens up new possibilities.

Proactivity

After you have gone through stages 1 and 2 you can think of behaviour that is predominantly in your own best interest. What is predominantly in your own best interest is - amongst others - based on your own morals and values. Also consider emotional, personal, financial and long term consequences when deciding on your behaviour.

When you practice the three stages regulary, you will see that you will start to expand your behavioural repertoire more and more. In this way you are better prepared to deal with different situations that may confront you. You will face and handle these confrontations easier, benefit better from certain situations or simply feel better!

Let me know how you are doing!

Waldemar,
Staging